Not About Boys

So i have re-read all of my posts and I realize something...I make no fucking sense in alot of them.
I have to stop writing to you guys when Im overtired or super pissed cuz then I am slamming my keyboard and typing as fast as I can and its just not good.

So, I am going to make this post a life update, not about boys WHAT SO EVER!

So, school is going really well, I am really ahead and I think thats going to help me graduate early.

This week is very exciting because me and some friends are going shopping at a little mall outside of our town. Its kinda small and has minimal stores, but it has all the good stores.

Im looking for a job because now that Ive taken three pre-something classes I can get a bunch of credits through working so thats fun.

Friends have been great, I dont usually have any great drama with friends so Its not really ever a huge deal.

Uhm, my puppy is getting older and biting alot so we have to get him a muzzle or something because hes been biting kids lately and thats really unacceptable.

Im also looking forward to repainting my room. Im thinking a really pretty aqua blue and a rome theme. Ya know, art and food and yummy stuff. Rome, Paris or New York are all acceptable themes for me and my style.

Okay, So I have written a nice long update blog about life and boys have not been mentioned so thats great!

ALSO- TO MY FOLLOWERS AND VIEWERS PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS! Im really getting bored of updating and getting 0 feedback. Honestly!

And just to clear up confusion which I got from rereading my blogs. I said I was 3 years younger then the 18 year old guy, I was wrong, I thought he was a few years older then he was so my bad...im not 15.

And, yea. I think thats all I have to say right about now and Ill update when I have more news for yall!

XXOO
Rory

Its always their fault

Am I cursed?
Is it my problem?
Is there something wrong with me?
Will I ever find a guy who isn't a big shit face?


Uh...god...boys can all suck a  dick right now. They all suck at the moment and they can all go die.


Ok, so me and the guy hung out... ya know the guy...from the last post. the first actual nice guy bla bla bla, scrap that, forget it. I was wrong.


Okay, I would like to know how guys are able to fool girls? I consider myself smart. Im paranoid about everything, so I should have seen this coming right? Well I didn't.


Wanna know what happened? Well, Okay!


So we hung out on Thursday last week and we were walking around town, went to MAC's to get an energy drink and then walked to the field, arms around each other... He gave me a piggy back and touched my butt and we walked and walked. 


We got to the high school and went to the back where there is a big field and a open shack where people can go sit. So he led me there and we went and sat, and talked and sat and talked and whatever. Then I wqas telling him a story and I was mid sentence when he turned my head towards him, i was still talking at this point and then he leans forward and jams his tongue to the back of my throat. Awesome. Now, I realized that this was awkward and simply a terrible kiss but I was still weirdly excited because i really liked him.  So he obviously thought it was great because he went in four more times for more kisses.


Then we went to the front of the school where I got picked up because my car was at home. He kissed my forehead and gave me a long hug and I was really giddy. I went through the night in my mind and aside from the kiss it was awesome. 


I kept focusing on that kiss, thinking oh god was i bad? No i wasn't bad, but he was kinda bad, oh god that was awkward I hope we can practice that, oh what if he thinks it was because of me that it was bad? Why would he kiss me four more times if he thought it was bad...and so on.




So we texted that night and he was like it was fun gotta hang out again bla bla.


Anyways, so we don't talk over the weekend or anything, I text him, hello...no response. Thats fine, he's busy.


So i hear on wednesday he's going around telling people I don't know how to kiss and he is not texting me ever again. Awesome. I love boys so much.


Apparently its also going around that we had sex. So thats extra fun.


The thing that gets me is that he is the only guy who has ever treated me like this, made me like him a lot then totally became the bad guy. I wasn't prepared and I let down my walls.


I hate him a lot, but I think im going to continue to let my walls down, because i've been guarded for awhile and thats not any way to go through life.


And as people say, if it doesn't work, it wasn't ment to be and there are BILLIONS of other people out there for you! Why stress over just one. Im not actually sad or mad at all anymore, I was for the day I heard about it but I don't care now, honestly I don't. I just want to focus on finding the right guy for me at this point in my life. 


isn't that what we all want? yes.

Moving on Happily.

Ok, so now I have found a guy. An actual guy who I really like alot. No, it isnt the guy from my last post, the one who is hot and 18 and stuff. This guy is an actual boyfriend possibility.

We met through a friend who used to like him and as the girl code states, I made sure it was okay with her several times! she was quite insistant that we date actually.

So we hung out today and we had been texting before...R texting if ya know what Im saying ;)

It was amazing. Granted it was chilly and I totally did not dress from cold or even nippy weather, it was still awesome.

So you want the skinny on what happened? Well, okay!

We met at the library, went for a walk, bought stuff at a convience store, went for a walk, ended up at a feild where there were a few families and stuff playing far away.

heres the kicker....we kissed! It was an amazing kiss. It caught me by surprise though because we were talking about littering or something that he like leaned his head down to my level cuz hes really tall and i moved in and kissed him. Its kind of hard getting a rhythm when its your first kiss but by our second time it was alot more natural.

He is really nice and fun and Im able to talk to him. There is something in the back of my head thats saying dont go there, but I think its because I have trust issues.

This one time in middle school, I really liked this guy so we were dating for like five minutes and this girl runs up to me and was like, you know so and so paid him five bucks. I was like...haha really...haha...this sucks thats fucking loser. So, ya trust issues.

But I think he could help me get over that.

Im n a giddy mood, and i have already bragged to like three people, and now Im bragging to you. :0

Much Love,

XOXO

(I saw I have three followers now, so hello)

And Again we go...

So that guy i mentioned last time who was chatting with me on facebook, met him. (hes a friend of a friend and he thinks im SO HOT) He is kinda a babe.
Do you notice that when I start to like someone they f it up? EXAMPLE!
There is this other guy, I cant remember if I talked about him and Im too lazy and too tired to go check so deal. Well we were gonna have a pants off dance off (name that reference) and then I told him there was absolutley no chance of sex whatsoever! he bailed.

Perhaps that wasnt because I started to like him but because he was a PIG!

Anyways me and this guy who I like sorta, not getting my hopes up this time though.

(If you notice my spelling and wording suck today cuz i am fucking overtired.)

Anyways we were like just talking about school and shit, and before that we were talking hanging out and how he scared the shit outta me today and my friend. Wont go into detail because it was funny after and kinda long.

The point is, we can transfer from a light subject to a serious subject and I havent had that in a long time.

Kinda refreshing.

I am entering at every new though; that means this is gonna be super long.

Tell ya how it works out as it progresses.

Night XOXO